Duke Nukem: We're All Sexists Now

I already expressed my initial opinions of Duke Nukem Forever earlier.  Obviously the game has a problem with professional reviewers.  But it goes even further than that now.  It's now a sexist, embarrassing game that society should do away with.  Strip clubs and jokes about tampons.  This was alluded to by reviews on GameSpot and Giant Bomb who called DNF's humor unfunny and distasteful.  More reviewers & columnists are opening up about this now.  Not all girls find The Duke attractive.

Anyway, after writing my initial article, I learned more information about the game and still find things offensive about it.  I'm not going to give some stupid "games are art" lecture here.  As a white, Christian male, I don't approve of the salacious lifestyle of players, pimps, hookers, and whatnot.  But Duke doesn't bother me.  Why?  Cause he's an EXAGGERATED figure living in a fictional world of ugly aliens and hot babes.  Going around in that macho voice--"Let's go get some babes..." it's comical and shouldn't be taken as an attack on the female role in society.

And Duke fights to save these babes.  As for the girls in the hive level, well, they're fubar as it is so I don't know why everyone's portraying that as the "rape" scene in the game.  EDIT: The same "pod-girls" were also in Duke Nukem 3D so this isn't new.  The alien boobs on the wall?  Stupid, but those don't belong to actual human people (I presume).

EDIT AGAIN: Okay, I forgot to mention this.  Some people are mad that the game's lighthearted tone ends once you reach the Hive level where Duke shows no emotion to the countless women whom suffer or are killed (especially the Twins).  The fact that Duke didn't show more emotion I blame the lousy writing more than anything.  Don't hate on Duke, hate on the guys who made him say "I hate valve puzzles"...

And there's games of similar nature that people have defended.  God of War with the gruesome violence, torture, the rough sex minigame?  Perfectly fine, everyone loves this game.  Mass Effect 2 with the side nudity and the Fox News reports?  Oh how dare you insult that game!  Grand Theft Auto with the innuendo, strip clubs, hot coffee and the ability to kill, run over, and torture innocent people?  Hey, you Jack Thompsons out there, it's just a game, don't insult it!  But with Duke Nukem, no...it's a terrible game and all copies should be buried out in the Nevada desert along with E.T.

Hey, don't get me wrong--the most detestable part of the game is the near-nudity of the strippers at the club.  I'm not saying this game should get off the hook because if producers want to make games then they should take all the blame for the content.  But let's not pretend that DNF is the most offensive game ever made because there's more that I've found to be more offensive.  That's my two cents.  If you are a female, well...you may not like it.  But everything's so PC nowadays, it's ridiculous so screw it.  If you want a good "target" to go after, just blame MTV and all those rap videos, those are worse because they actually deal with REAL LIFE...

Or an entirely another way to deal with the problem, say "Shut up b****, get back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich." *sarcasm*

"Not my babes! Not in my town! You alien motherf***ers are gonna pay for this!"

"Hell, I'd still hit it."

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Oh and one more fun fact about Duke Nukem...there's a lithograph in the game that's similar to Kramer's painting from Seinfeld.  Being a Seinfeld buff, I was quick to point that out...and laugh.

He is a loathsome brute...yet I cannot look away.

Spike VGA's And Stupid Stuff

First off, I took a shower a while back and I got some water in my ear which has me completely disoriented right now so that sucks.

I had no idea the Spike Video Game Awards were this Saturday, nor did I care.  It's so tempting to get on here and call the show a piece of crap, but I'm not even going to do that.  It is what it is.

The Winners.

Game of the Year: Red Dead Redemption.  Now I don't really care any way.  At least it wasn't something overly violent and annoying like God of War.

Best Shooter: Call of Duty: Black Ops.  Now I love how when I'm on the 360 Dashboard, I see all this stuff for Halo: Reach.  Buy Halo Reach!  Mess around with the Forge Editor and all that crap.  Well guess what--everyone's playing Call of Duty: Black Ops.  I hate to sound like a jerk, but I prefer the contemporary style of Call of Duty over Halo, sorry that's just the way I think.  Way back to Counter-Strike and Goldeneye.

EDIT:
Basically, it's like that quote "Men love blondes but marry brunettes," or something.  So everyone buys Call of Duty but MS would prefer if you played Halo.  I think that's how it works.

Best Driving Game: Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit.  Now, I would've picked Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing but remember, no one cares about cool stuff like that anymore.  Thankfully, Hot Pursuit is not a game that I loathe.  We should all be thankful that Split/Second didn't win instead.  I don't even know if GT5 was nominated.

Best Music Game: Rock Band 3.  As it should be.

Best Downloadable Game: Costume Quest.  Wrong answer man.  Should be Perfect Dark.  EDIT: I'm also surprised it wasn't Super Meat Boy.

As for the rest of the awards, I don't care and I'm not going to bother mentioning them because I would be wasting your time.

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Then there's also game announcements and stuff.  You have Kratos from God of War who will appear in Mortal Kombat.  First of all, I can't believe these two are still going.  Sure, slash and hack each other to death.  I still think it's weird that Kratos was in that PSP Soul Calibur which doesn't make any sense cause there's no gore in it.

But then there's Forza 4.  Just after GT5.  You know these guys are going for the jugular here.  Polyphony Digital had six years to work on it and people have brought up tons of complaints.  I may seem partial to GT5, but I think they may have screwed up really bad here.  We'll see if Forza 4 gets the PI ratings right and throws in some new courses, then GT6 will be playing catchup big-time.  Kazunori Yamauchi, you had the sim racing genre down until then, you played prevent defense and now you're on your heels.

Forza 4 trailer.

Just for show.  I think it's really weird that you can "ramp" another car in GT5 since in previous ones, I thought your collision box extended the entire space above and below your car, but not here:

I'm done talking, goodbye.