Rush: An Adrenaline Shot In Movie Form

When I heard there was going to be a "Rush" movie in 2013, I nearly pissed myself.  They're making a shitty movie adaptation for San Francisco Rush the game, a la Need for Speed?

Actually, no, this has nothing to do with video games, cause this is "based on a true story."  A really good story about two rival Formula 1 drivers, James Hunt (England) and Niki Lauda (Austria).  And thank you Ron Howard for being an actual petrolhead and not f***ing up this movie like Hollywood usually does (the movie cynic in me enjoys poking holes in things, like this).  88% on Rotten Tomatoes isn't bad!

As you can tell, this was in the 70's when safety was of little concern and musicians actually made decent music.  No seriously, they actually play Gimme Some Lovin' in the first racing scene which proves Ron saw Days of Thunder, or something, so tack on an extra star to the final score!  Rubbin' is racing!!!  Boogity boogity!!!

Here you have the two protagonists, Lauda and Hunt, who are Formula 3 rivals that moved up to Formula 1, and they totally contrast in personality.  James Hunt is a raw talent, a brash driver who loves to party.  He defied F1 driver tradition that a driver must behave and be treated like royalty.  Hunt loved the lady parts, as you can see right away within the first 30 seconds of the movie, Hunt is banging the nurse.  So thank you James for turning this movie into a porno.  He's also bulimic because he throws up before every race.

Mim-bo (noun) - a male bimbo.

On the other hand, Niki Lauda is the MAN.  More reserved, cool, calm, and calculated, he could tune cars like no one's business.  He has a cool-ass name and actually stayed faithful to his wife (at least for a little while).  Niki is what's great about racing.

Pictured: my new man-crush.

So quick rundown of the movie.  Hunt and Lauda are in Formula 3, Hunt wins the championship and later gets a Formula 1 ride with Hesketh, some crappy race team that thought driving a bleached white car with no sponsors is a good idea.  On the other hand, Lauda "cheated," denounced his father's boring-ass businessman lifestyle, took out a big loan, and swooned the Ferrari people by building a superior car that outdid the previous ones by several seconds.  Lauda would then later race a coupe through rural Italy to impress two fanboys and his future wife, proving that he's a baller.  At this point, the HEAT WAS ON between the two gentlemen...

Both sweet whips with that vintage 70's camera tint.  Notice the lack of #hashtags on their names (#twitterblows).

Both drivers took turns having strokes of life-changing bad luck.  Hunt was first.  Hesketh ran out of money and fired Hunt, leaving him to sit at home and watch his wife cheat on his scummy ass.  Hunt would later bang the flight attendant in the restroom to showcase his libido.  Lauda would go on to win his first championship, something that is skimmed over in the film.  The 1976 season is when Hunt gets a ride at McLaren and the two begin their duel.

Season begins in Brazil with some damn hot Carnival babes and quick 10-15 previews of each race of the season.  Lauda would take a commanding lead in the points as Hunt's car would frequently explode.  Hunt goes into Hulk mode and strikes back, winning a few races of his own, making them 1st-2nd in the points.

Later it's the German GP at Nurburgring.  Yes, THE Nurburgring Nordschleife with 154 turns.  And to make things worse, it's raining.  One racer was already hospitalized during practice.  Lauda then holds a driver's meeting and tries to call the race off as too dangerous, Hunt basically calls him a pussy, and the drivers race anyway.  Both Hunt and Lauda opt for wet tires at the start only for the track to dry up quickly and both to go to the pits for dry tires after the first lap.

And here's where Lauda's bad luck strikes.  Obviously way behind from the leader, he pushes the car so hard the suspension breaks on one turn as he goes careening into the wall in a blazing inferno as some other guy wrecks into Lauda's flaming casket.  Lauda suffers paralyzing burns and smoke inhalation while Hunt laughs his ass off as he wins races while Lauda is on the hospital bed.

This wreck seems oddly symbolic to my recent woes that I teared up in the theater.  One morning in May 2013, while racing to work on the wet pavement, I push the car harder than I should in an attempt to make up ground.  Eventually the wet pavement gets the best of me as I slide into a dumpster, smashing it up in the process.  Three days later, I would be fired from my job and sit unemployed for five months as distraught me has to watch my friend and rivals move up the career ladder without me.  My story isn't as bad as Lauda's but the similarities are there!  Fuck wet blacktop parking lots, put up a friggin sign or something.

Eventually, Lauda would go through accelerated therapy, have the junk sucked out of his lungs and the bandaids peeled from his head.  A month passed and Hunt nearly caught up to him in the points.  Lauda gets back out there (a burnt up disfigured mess, no doubt) and after giving the best "fuck you" I've ever heard to an asshole reporter, puts up a solid 4th place at Monza with fans running at his car after the race while Hunt DNF's again.  Which meant one thing...

NIKI LAUDA

IS

BACK

Final race of the season!  It's at Fuji Speedway--PREPARE TO QUALIFY!!!  Oh, and it's raining.  F1 cars can drive in the rain but in the storm that you see here?  Well...yes they could back in the 70's, when they had big balls and the rides were high enough to make wet racing possible.  After one lap of driving through dense fog, Lauda does the most admirable thing a driver can do--goes to the pits and retires from the race.  It's too dangerous, he said, it's not worth risking your lives over a stupid trophy!  Tell that to Hunt who needs to finish 3rd or better to beat Lauda for the grand prize.  It was a nailbiter for Lauda as all he could do is watch and pray Hunt doesn't win...

Obligatory F1 car in the rain shot.

SHOCKER--Hunt finishes 3rd, wins the championship, and Lauda has no regrets.  It wasn't racing, Lauda said, it was stupid of Hunt to risk his life like that.  After a bunch of TV appearances and booze, drug, and women sessions later, Hunt meets Lauda again, Lauda having taken up the hobby of flying planes.  They tip their hats to each other and the movie ends.  Lauda would go on to win two more championships and live to see the premiere of this movie (which he admired, BTW) while Hunt would go on to be a race announcer and die of a heart attack in 1993.  While Hunt turned out to be a washed-up loser who won his only championship cause his main competition was hospitalized by a near-death experience, Lauda later admitted Hunt was the only driver he was ever jealous of.  Which means a lot from the man, myth, and legend that is NIKI LAUDA.

Great movie, would see again.  Very accurate and gives you a sense of what vintage Formula 1 racing was really like  Only disappointment is that there's too much talking in the first half of the movie (come on, I wanna see some racing), plus there's no final race between Lauda and Hunt to settle the score once and for all.  But a final race would be unrealistic.  Also at no point do they play a Rush song in the movie though that would be cheesy as hell.  So I'll give you some Rush right here.

Oh well, I give this FIVE out of FOUR stars (remember the additional one cause of Gimme Some Lovin').  Just go watch the movie, seriously, right away, race in an F1 car to the theater or Redbox now.

1976, same year Fleetwood Mac would release The Chain, best F1 song ever, no question.  I WANNA GO FAST!!!

I can't tell you how many times I typed "Nikia Lauda" while writing this post, lol.

Sonic & Danica, Lolwut

I must say this year's E3 was very entertaining.  Entertaining in that we had lots of things to poke fun at!  Seriously, when they closed E3 to the public, gamers wanted back in so they opened it up again.  Now gamers want to get out of there as soon as possible.  What's going on, people.

But anyway, OMGZ YUO GAISSSSS HERD DA NEEEEWWWWWZZZZ, Danica Patrick is in Sega All-Stars Racing 2!!!!  And there's about one billion articles on this very story on gaming sites, racing sites, sports sites, even on CNBC (???).  News bloggers/repeaters copied and pasted everything they saw from the other schmuck..."Gamers will get the chance to test their racing abilities as Danica against an All-Star cast of SEGA characters including Sonic, Knuckles, AiAi and others."  Yada yada yada, like 95% of the people who post these articles care (or even know) about Sega characters or Danica Patrick.

Also love the Masanao Maeda (President & COO of Sega of America) quote:

"Danica Patrick is one of the most popular athletes in the world and her accomplishments both on and off the track make her the perfect partner for Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed. Danica’s involvement showcases the broad appeal of this title – everyone from casual gamers to hard core racing fans will be able to enjoy the fun."

Most popular in the world??  Maybe in your dreams, she is...

Hey look guys, I can Ctrl-C, Ctrl-V too!  It's secret agent DarthSOL (from Sumo Digital)!

"You know, when they (SEGA) pitched us the idea we went ‘The fans will go wild…’ I think they didn’t get what we meant from that though.

End of the day she hasn’t replaced any SEGA characters, she’s an extra and we’re very happy with the vehicle design we’ve done for her, which incidentally isn’t the one you might think it is."

I can understand why there's so few Daytona fans left.  Cause when you are teased like this on a consistent basis, no wonder so many jumped ship.  We're doomed, we're dead, I'm on the roof and if I see one more Need for Speed advertisement, I'm gonna jump.  EDIT: I'm just kidding...if DarthSOL is reading this, we love ya buddy :p

Anyway, I wonder how far Sega will go with factoring Danica into the game's presentation/advertisements.  She's driving the blue #7 Sega car at the Nationwide race at Texas on November 3rd.  Which is a crap day because everything will be enshrouded by the Presidential Election.  As for the game, I have a hunch she may be the race announcer/narrator (they said the old announcer is gone).  What she looks like (realistic, cartoony, etc.) and what the car looks like is beyond me.

But anyway, I will not flip a bitch about the Danica pick like 2/3rds of the gamers on the Internet have done (i.e. Sega sold out, they don't know anything, Danica sucks cause she only won one race, NASCAR sucks).  I mean just think about it--this is Sega we're talking about, you get used to these kind of things by now :)

Hmm....imposing a real-life female "bombshell" actor onto a fictional arcade racer...think I've seen this before:

That's Brooke Burke, Need for Speed: Underground 2 narrator and 5-year host of Dancing with the Stars!!  And she's a BABE (apparently).  And Pocketbike Racer is the greatest driving sim known to man.

A Danica thread is never complete without Go Daddy commercials.

I admit, I lol'ed...

That's it, two GoDaddy commercials is ENOUGH.

But wait--there's also this! ...

Hey Sega, none of this would've been an issue if YOU JUST ANNOUNCED THE HORNET AND/OR SEGATA SANSHIRO AS PLAYABLE CHARACTERS.  Dammit, it's time for bed, I'll talk more smack tomorrow, I swear.  But here guys, this is to cheer you up:

I love this corporation...GOOD EFFORT!!  GOOD JOB!!

EDIT: Rather than make a new post on this, here's Danica doing a brief interview with Kotaku/Gametrailers/I don't know who so just listen in anyway:



A lot of this ain't new but it's just strange to hear Danica repeat what we've already heard--"you go by land, you go by sea, and you go by air...the race combines all of them and I'm a character you can play."  I get the sense she doesn't know that much about the game, but what do you expect from a new spokesperson who has had very little to do with video games up until now?  Yeah, like I was expecting Danica to reveal Daytona spoilers in the video, lol, fat chance...

You're Killing Me Namco, GameFAQs, Sonic Fans!!!

Well here's a few things on the backburner I would like to mention.  More complaints from yours truly, yay.

First, I would like to begin by applauding Namco for being the greatest, most classiest game developer ever.  They truly blow my mind.  The way they handle their IP's like a pro.  And how they advertise them too.

Ivy Valentine's cleavage in a Namco ad.  Borderline NSFW.

I don't get why the first commenter of the feature discussion (a feminazi who blasted the hell out of Duke Nukem Forever) thought this was okay.  If this isn't objectifying women, I don't know what is.  The entire poster is Ivy's breasts.  How can you defend this?  I don't have a problem with scantily-clad women in games as long as it's not overdone and the women resemble some sort of "beauty."  But now Namco has run out of ideas, resorting to Tecmo's tactics to gain relevance.  Hey, you can strip down any character to their underwear thanks to their extensive customization options so isn't it the same thing as DOA Beach Volleyball but with more violence?

Taking a look at Namco-Bandai's releases in the last few years, they're in Sega's boat in that they're putting out games but most are rehashes or developed by other studios.  And you never hear about anything Namco-related from the blogs other than Soul Calibur and (awful) Ridge Racer so what's the point?  Namco is a benchwarmer now.  At least Sega has "prestige" because Sonic gets some press as does Nagoshi & Suzuki with their antics.  No wonder Namco is desperate...sticking a camera in front of a fictional character's breasts.

EDIT: A month later, Namco has also created ads of Cassanda's ass and Voldo's nether region.  I'm not making this stuff up.  And no, I'm not going to link to it.  Soul Calibur is dead.

Namco will never live up to RBI Baseball...THAT'S RIGHT, the true Namco hero, alongside Pac-Man, Dig-Dug, the Galaga ship, and Mappy the friggin mouse.

------------

Now on to GameFAQs.  Thanks F40 for rehashing this poll so I could notice.  So they run a poll on 1/7/12 that says "Best Download-only Game of 2011."  Here are your choices:

Bastion
Dungeons of Dredmor
From Dust
Jamestown
Pushmo
SpaceChem
Stacking
Terraria
The Binding of Isaac
Trine 2

The votes are irrelevant since Bastion followed by Terraria are way in the lead.  So there's no Daytona USA but that's cause it's a port of a really old game so what's to be expected there.  But you know what's missing? Renegade Ops.  Didn't everyone love that game?  Giant Bomb gave it a 5/5?  I loved the game too.  That's part of the Sega family and it just got ROBBED.

You know what would be the s***?  If they took down GameFAQs.  I would pay massive Microsoft Points for that DLC addon!!

And another thing.  Call me a moron but I don't think I've ever heard of half these games from the media.  SpaceChem?  Jamestown?  I don't effin now anymore.

Well, what else is new.  I'm beginning to think the Sega logo is a kiss of death.  Some games are hurt much more than others (Bayonetta is relatively intact) but those four blue letters are a good way to get people to ignore you.  DO NOT DOUBT ME.  Let's try to break the curse by aiding Sega when we can, eh?

BTW, the narrator for Bastion makes me want to jump off a bridge.

------------

And then there's another GameFAQs board (Good Lord) that's up to no good.  It just happens to be the Sonic Generations board.  That board has devolved from actually talking about Generations to bickering over which Sonic games suck or not.  Like this topic, this topic, and this topic.  While I don't necessarily mind debate (hell I roast plenty of games here), I don't go on forums for the specific purpose of getting in 1 on 1's with other people, quoting each other, trying to get the edge by debating the most petty things.

The Sonic fanbase just doesn't know what they want anymore.  If Sega didn't "shake the baby" back during the last decade, this probably wouldn't be happening.  I can see it now--the Mario & Zelda fanbases are laughing their asses off now.  The worst they have to complain about is whether or not Super Mario Galaxy 2 is better than Galaxy 1.  Or whether or not Majora's Mask is better than Ocarina of Time.

Well, what can you say about a franchise that has Chris-Chan as a member?  I just discovered this recently, but there's an ENTIRE Wiki site dedicated to every detail of his life (subtlety NSFW in a few places).  In case you don't know who Chris Chan is (and you really should just turn back now), he's a man-child with severe Autism who immerses himself in a world of constant gaming, fanart & fiction with characters like "Sonichu," rage towards everybody, and tons of erotic fantasies about God knows what.  Never mind the Rule 34 content from the rest of the fanbase, he alone sets back the Sonic community ten years.  I have a young brother with Autism and I know it really sucks but his (EDIT: talking about Chris) behavior is way past the point of using Autism as an excuse.

And about the Wiki site...isn't it illegal to publicly that much private information about someone?  I'm just curious, I don't want the HIRE A LAWLER TO TAKE DOWN DIS WEBSATE.  Sure, the media does this a lot with celebrities & politicians, but nowhere near the extent that this Wiki does.  People have been hacking his e-mail accounts and stuff, gathering every single account of his life, it's pretty demented.  Even if they were making this stuff up as they went along, it's still slanderous.  But nonetheless, Chris still plugs along at whatever he does.

No wonder Sonic is in the dumps.  I'll leave you with this pic:

Chris Chan, Jackie Chan, haha

And I know all the big gaming blogs beat me to this but what is Sonic doing in a Progressive commercial???  Progressive does auto insurance, not health/life insurance.  I don't think Flo can save you from a pit of spikes.

But hey, at least it ain't Klonoa or Pac-Man.  Namco, get your notepads out.

Also the Saints won so Who Dat.  And I'll be heading back to Florida for escuela on a nine-hour drive.  I'll talk about it later I guess.

Merry Christmas, Now Go Buy OutRun Online Arcade NOW

Hi guys, I'm sorry I didn't make an "official" Christmas post but I've been fading in and out for the last few days.  I also got sidewinded by Nagoshi and football stuff.  Overall, it wasn't a great Christmas: there weren't a whole lot of Christmas lights around but at the mall, they added a San Francisco Rush 2049 arcade machine (with a screen tinted green...someone please fix that) and the Fast & Furious twin cabinet was broken.  HAHA!  Otherwise, the time leading up to it wasn't that much fun but at least I got to spend time with friends and family so that is good.

Now I was going to say this earlier but I planned this for now.  This is my plea:

For everyone who has an Xbox 360, please go buy OutRun Online Arcade.  You have until Dec 31 to buy it.  That gives you two days to do it.  Then the game will be removed from the marketplace due to an expiry with the Ferrari license.

Go here to download the game (if you're too lazy to download off your console)...the price has been fluctuating between 400 and 800 MSP but oh well.  IT IS WORTH EVERY PENNY.  Also, if you're feeling extra generous, be sure to download the gamer pics and BG themes!!  Get these before they're gone forever!

Now about the game being removed from the marketplace.  A common misconception is that you won't be able to play the game after it's not on the marketplace.  This is not true.  As long as the game remains on your hard drive, you can play it "forever."  Essentially what happens is that the game still remains on the marketplace servers and you can redownload it as many times as you want ASSUMING you purchased the game before Dec 31.  Same thing applies to a few old Midway game I purchased: Paperboy and Root Beer Tapper.  I can still play those even though they've been delisted years ago.

It's like a club and the only way you can get in is if you buy a ticket before the deadline so buy that ticket (to ride) now!

And I know some people may not be as interested in racing games, but this game's a blast.  Dashing gameplay, Ferraris, colorful environments, uplifting music, and hot babes.  It's a therapeutic game, even if you only play it for just an hour.  It'll change your life.  It changed mine!



YouTube comments: "best 800 points ive ever spent" and "This title is actually worth the 800 points..I loved the original on the master system.. brings back so many memories!"  Well said.

Now I'll post a few extra pics to try to convince you otherwise:

AWESOME OUTRUN BOX ART!!!

Dec 31 . My stratagy to sell sega Racing Games is working!!  Now you know hwy I have the most wwebsite as on the internet.  so go put on your big boy hat and Play Outrun Online Arcade . peace out =)

Supplemental Reading.

Need For Speed: The EPIC FAIL...

Oh boy, Need for Speed: The Run...it's BACK!  EA has done it again!!!

Check of this official pair of Need for Speed sneakers, made by Adidas! See look, it says "The Run" right on there.  The hell?  The point of the game is to drive, baby, not run from the cops!  A steering wheel cover makes more sense than this.  Shiny ass shoes ain't getting by my white New Balances (black shoes are ghetto)...

Runnin' from the cops in my Adidas--oh wait, he's not wearing them here (black soles).  Gotta get those shoes if ya wanna stay fly...



And it gets even better!  EA pulls one of Nagoshi's tricks out of the bag, taking it to the extreme...EA hires some Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Models to sell the game.  Last time I checked, Nagoshi's girls actually wore clothes.  Buy Need for Speed: The Run, a Making-Of-The-Game, and a SI Swimsuit subscription for just $50!  Sell out much, EA?

Is it just me, or is Need for Speed supposed to be the "definitive" racing game of our generation?  Like when you say "racing game," the first thing that comes to mind is NFS?  How many Need for Speeds are there in this generation and, with the exception of Hot Pursuit, who's saying that they're all so good?  Ever since when did we let this happen?  Because EA is rich and everyone else is not?  Because Sega is too inept to fill the semi-arcade racing void?  Ok, Need for Speed isn't the worst racer nowadays but it's not one of my faves...

There's something funny about The Run anyway...just from this gameplay demo that I roasted earlier (and completely ignore the QTE sections).  Look at the scenario that's being played out here.  You're driving in your car from Point A to B.  The Mafia plows into your car.  Both parties in this crash are able to exit their cars and make a run for it (the Mafia chase you).  Then the cops chase you down.  Wait a sec--what about the Mafia?  Do the cops even care about them?  Last time I checked, intentionally blind-siding a car at 100 mph is against the law.  You can't just "rub out" people and get away with it.  But no matter--the cops want YOU in jail, not the Mafia, not anybody else.  You vs. the world.  They want to take you to jail so they can confiscate your super-fly Adidas sneakers.

Then after the train scene, what happens next?  You just steal another exotic/ricer/muscle car?  Wait, so now this game has become Grand Theft Auto?  I guess...

Yeah, yeah, I get it, it's supposed to be a suspense thriller (???) flick, but when you rely this heavily on cutscenes in your game, you know someone can tell if you're BSing us or not.

Even more NFS: The Run gameplay footage.  Now let's throw out all the cutscenes.  Pretend they don't exist.  Let's just look at the gameplay.  Here's a run through the snow-covered Rocky Mountains here.  Apparently, your guy is in such a mad dash to make it to the finish line that he'll traverse icy roads with avalanches falling down all around him.  Now, if this were real life, I'd park my ass on the side of the road until this avalanche ends OR I would just take another route altogether.  But it's a video game so we must press on!



Yes, from a general standpoint, it's "cool" but it's no longer racing--it's racing/action.  See, this is what I mean about the "racing" genre becoming absorbed with the "action" genre.  No one wants to drive cars and race against the clock.  They want to dodge boulders, run from the cops, do drive-by's, and smash other cars to pieces.  Regular racing is just too damn boring, it seems.  And if developers are going to load up all their racing games with Michael Bay-action sequences/explosions, then oh well, I can't stop it!

Now, back to what gave me this idea to talk about.  We were briefly talking about racing games during our "violent game" lecture at FIEA.  The point was if violent FPS/hack-and-slash games turn you into a sadistic killer, then does playing dangerous cop-chasing/opponent-smashing racers turn you into a black-jacket wearing rebel who has no respect for authority?  Example: see Speed Racer after having played Burnout (can't embed this video).

Anyway, about NFS: The Run.  It's based off of the "Cannonball Baker Sea-To-Shining-Sea Memorial Trophy Dash," or "Cannonball Run" for short.  It is a cross-country race held in the 70's across North America from New York to Los Angeles (The Run has it in reverse, sorry).  An ACTUAL race, not some Burt Reynolds flick.  Not like I've never seen the cross-country motif before--see Cruis'n USA and OutRun.  Remember "I Can't Drive 55 (mph)?" 

Tha police

The rules: Make it from the starting line to the finish in the same car.  Get to the end any way possible without hopping on a plane/ship/train.  Getting ticketed/arrested/haggled by the police is okay.  But there were no serious rules to the race.  No running from the Mafia or dodging trains (unless you're that much of a rabble rouser).  As a matter of fact, the race was so absurd that cops may have deliberately blocked traffic to allow the racers through.  Also there were no egregious disasters other than a few speeding tickets and pissed off law enforcemen.

Will Wright (of SimCity/Maxis fame) was the co-driver of a Mazda RX-7 that won in 1980.  It turned out to be the inspiration of Streets of SimCity.

But wait.  What's that--an EA logo?  Why, EA IS EVERYWHERE, IT'S A CONSPIRACY!!!

Although, I think you're right.  Driving down an empty highway with no traffic & boulders to dodge is no fun.  Need for Speed wins.

Hey look, Forza 4 is out today.  A racing game that actually allows you to just damn race for once.  Once you see it, you can't unsee it.

I know the "W" is supposed to be an exhaust manifold, I get it.

Ridge Racer: U, GRID, & Driver: San Francisco

Right now, there are rumors circulating about this Daytona "port."  Is this a straight up port of Daytona USA?  That's what I think.  But it's certainly strange that the namesake defies tradition because it doesn't have "Online Arcade" in the title...why do we have OutRun Online Arcade, Sega Rally Online Arcade, then just Daytona USA?  There's other theories floating around that this is really a Daytona USA compilation or even a Sega All-Stars Racing 2 but...I don't know.  I don't know enough to talk about it.

Every day I accumulate all these thoughts in my head and I need to post them on this blog.  So I can't just "drop" everything because we're on the verge of Sega history.  We're doing okay so please take it easy.

------------

Anyway, I'm looking at this Ridge Racer Unbounded game and there's not much good to say about it.  I'm still cryin' over this game's release.  Putting aside all the crap Burnout elements, I first notice that the game runs at 30 FPS, a glaring demerit that all racing games should avoid (Sega All-Stars Racing unfortunately does this, but it redeems itself in other ways).  Also, it still doesn't look anything like Ridge Racer.


I really love the part at :50 and 1:13 where the sports car was able to plow through three concrete pillars AND a wall without so much as a dent.  About as absurd as driving through the water in California Speed.


As a matter of fact, Ridge Racer Unbounded looks like Flatout (a previous Bugbear game, see above) with a Burnout/NFS motif.  Believe it or else, Bugbear also handled the PSP port of Sega Rally Revo....

You could take out the "Ridge Racer" part of the title and you'd never even know.  The only thing that has to do with Ridge Racer is Reiko Nagase, the Ridge Racer girl.  WHAT WERE THEY THINKING???

Unshameful Reiko Nagase Pic

EDIT: ARRRRGGGHHH, why don't these pics work the first time???

Also, another thing you see here is a very unique alternative to the traditional racing HUD.  The score & position are emitted holo-screen style from specific walls on the track.  Kind of like in Split/Second with the HUD items glued to the car bumpers.  My main problem with this is that I can't just check my position/score anytime I want--I have to wait for one of those screens to come around.  That's okay, I like waiting...it's "cool" that way.

We went over something like this at FIEA, my gaming school.  One of the things that games are really pushing for is limited HUD's.  Basically, the less numbers on the screen, the better.  Numbers make you feel like you're playing a game!  Lack of numbers makes you feel like you're actually driving a car!  The whole goal is absorb as much data as possible without actually having to "think" (or glaze over) HUD items.

Really?  Are HUD items really that bad?  I like games like Daytona and they have all sorts of stuff on the screen--lap info, track layout, timer, tach/speedometer, etc.  You start taking away these things and it usually makes the game more shallow.  Get rid of the tachometer--bam, no need for manual transmission since you can't tell when to shift.  Get rid of the track map--bam, you stop driving tactically and start driving reactionary--no need to "plan" your racing line, just twitch at the sign of any turn.  Get rid of the speedometer and--bam, you might as well be riding a bicycle instead.  Get rid the timer--bam, you have all the time in the world to jerk off.  See what I'm getting at here?

As a matter of fact, you can use the HUD to make the game more immersive.  For instance, in Daytona USA 2, when you crash, the HUD rocks back and forth along with the car suspension.  So implicit details like this are just icing on the cake.

Also, Ridge Racer Unbounded will have some sort of Create-A-City Mode...odds are it won't be as detailed as we hope and it doesn't even matter anyway since I'm not looking to invest in this game anyway.

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And here's GRID--some Codemasters arcade game published by Sega.  Yes, I know GRID was also on home consoles, but any decent arcade games that Sega can get out there, that's money in their pocket so w/e.  Basically, I feel like I'm watching the Project Gotham Racing trailer.  Although it kind of reminds me of Scud Race with the various real-life sports cars (the Saleen, the CCGT, etc.) and cool tracks like Spa Francorchamps.  Does this game have over six cars per race though?  Remember playing Gran Turismo with just six cars on track at once?  How pathetic was that?



That eBay car is now burned into my brain.  Most eye-popping advertisement ever?  You can't avoid that logo no matter what you do (barring those leaderboards that get in the way).  Anyway, nothing new to see here--move along everyone...

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And then there's Driver: San Francisco.  Well, we all know about Driver--that free-roaming driving game that was soon usurped by Grand Theft Auto.  But this time, Driver: SF is actually....good.  Drive 100+ licensed cars around San Francisco.  This included Lamborghinis and Vipers--just like Forza except you can break the law!  Sadly, this game also comes with a lousy-ass plot involving cops & criminals.  That's completely original to me, I must admit.

The "plot" in this game involves protagonist John Tanner being put into a coma.  That's great, we're playing as a guy in a coma.  But somehow, he has the power to to "shift" to (or possess) any car (or driver, I dunno) on the road.  I admit that this concept is completely new to me.  You can use it for pragmatic reasons (assist in completing an objective) or just for fun (steal your favorite car).  So if you're in a police chase, you can immediately jump into the body of a nearby truck driver or texting teenage girl and have them plow into the suspect to aid your cause.  Or if you're crusin' and you see that rich guy's convertible, you can take it and just splatter everyone on the road (well, you can't run over anyone in the game, which is good).



John Tanner...you are that wheelchair guy from X-Men.  NO, not Xavier, that creepy hospitalized guy.  While you're getting your sponge bath, you're breaking up massive drug/smuggling cartels and pitting soccer moms in a game of Chicken.  Now that's some scary s*** there, gentlemen.

Now all the girls will be MINE!

I know that this feature is a substitute for the on-foot portions of the game...where you're walking around finding cars to hijack.  Now I know that was my favorite part of the Driver games--don't drive, just go for a jog.  I'm disappointed that the got rid of that feature.

RUN FOR FUN?

Anyway, if you take out all the Burnout elements, I'm pretty sure this is a damn good game...but another free-roam driver around a massive city?  See every GTA, every modern Need for Speed (except Pro Street), Saints Row 1/2, Midnight Club, previous Drivers, Streets of LA/NY, Burnout Paradise, The Getaway, L.A. Noire, etc.  I don't know man.  I know cop chases are fun, but dammit it's so cliche nowadays.  I'm undecided here.  I'd sure as hell take Driver: SF over RR: Unbounded, Split/Second, or all of that crap out there.

Or if you want a "boring" sim racer, check out F1 2011, nice to see a good traditional racer again (Formula 1 baby).

Woo........I'm tired......laters

Tokyo Game Show, Oh-Ho It Sucked

This weekend I had no work whatsoever which is strange because I thought game school was going to knock me out.  Remember, "no one leaves before 8 pm?"  Well I left before 8 every single day so far.  Really, come ask me how my first game went.  I was quite comfortable!  No late-night grinding/knashing of the teeth!  :D

"Don't push your luck little man...we'll drop the hammer on you soon enough."

Anyway, they just had this Toyko Game Show (taking place at the Makuhari Messe in Chiba, Japan) and there's not a lot that I really cared about.  First, Sega & Electronic Arts had to share the same booth--I'm not s***ting you (read third paragraph).  And as I'm looking at the official Sega blog posts (one and two)--OH GOD it's everyone's favorite delinquent at it again!!  Pimping out Yakuza and Binary Domain.  Like he has Tourette's...."YAKUZAYAKUZABINARYDOMAINBINARYDOMAINYAKUZAYAKUZA" etc.

Way to go, Nagoshi-san!  You got all these girls in the same room, but you can't even make a new Daytona game.  What a shallow man.

Hey babe, where's the Daytona games???

SegaShiro also took a few more pics...here's the EA part of the Sega booth.  So Sega's basically promoting Battlefield 3.  That's great.

And then the pictures gets weird..

For some reason, the Sega official blog can't stop taking pictures of food.  Well, you know what I had for dinner?  Dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.  I'm not making this up.

Look, it's the Sega Headquarters!!!  If Solid Snake and Sam Fisher could break in, we can too!!!  We're gamers, just put your minds to it.  Gamers always think they're macho like that--that's why we play intense action/adventure/RPG games...so we can be "cool."

Oh, and as usual, Sega is upstaged again by Capcom.  Crapcom had the best booth.  And then here's Keiji Inafune crying that he had wished he saved Megaman Legends 3 from cancellation.  Capcom flat out refused to let Inafune help them.  Even though Inafune "quit" (the trendy thing for ailing game designers to do, see Yuji Naka & Yu Suzuki), he was still able to do so under contract (I think).  EDIT: FYI, Inafune was THAT GUY who created Mega Man, just like Miyamoto created Mario & Zelda and Yuji Naka created Sonic.  So they killed Inafune's dreams...of a great Megaman game!  The bastards!!!

NOOOO!!!  THEY KILLED MY BABY!!!!!

So game developers, hang on closely to your old IP's, like Nagoshi with Daytona USA--aw hell, he doesn't even care anymore.

BTW, Nintendo doesn't even go to the Tokyo Game Show.  Instead, they sit back with their dopey 3DS joystick add-on and act all big and bad as usual.

Don't want to go to TGS?  What's the matter, Nintendo? CHICKEN???

NINTENDO!!!  I saw what you did there...  Because the 3DS sucks so bad and the Vita's gonna kick your ass, YOU ARE TERMINATED!!!

I know it doesn't make sense for Nintendo to be "fired" but this is just another lame attempt at a joke.

No one wins at TGS.  Just wait for the Daytona port to surface, ha.

It Has An OutRun 2 Emulator Too!

Hey guess what.  A VERY long time ago, at Circuit City (before it shut down), I bought OutRun 2006 for the PC.  I didn't install it until now, on my fancy new laptop.  Now I'm cruisin' to OutRun at 1920x1080 res!!  There was only a modicum of lag and that's when I drove off-road and kicked up some dust.

Nice...just click on the pics to enlarge. Okay, I'm not going to turn this into a photo dump especially since there's enough OR2 media out there already.

So I played the game on the keyboard. To be quite honest, this game is meant for consoles. First, let's take an arcade game then move it to consoles AND THEN to PC. As a matter of fact, the menus still use keyboards to navigate, not the mouse. So it's like I'm playing an emulator.

Because I'm using the keyboard, the game sure is hard as heck to handle...the car just jerks all over the place. Since I'm using non-analog controls, that's the breaks. I'm not even going to bother posting my best times since I've done much better before (let's just say over one minute for harder stages). Maybe if I can find a controller or, even better, a racing wheel, I can get going on this thing.

But while the game looks good at 1920x1080, you start to look at some of the buildings/textures and they're getting outdated. Well, duh, this game came out in '03 (ported to original Xbox) and for the most part, you're driving too fast to notice every intricate detail but when you're too busy crashing like I did (lol), you have time to examine the environment.  Like check out the cardboard crowds above (they stick out like a sore thumb).

Kind of sad that now OutRun 2 is a Sega artifact...forget about Daytona or Sega Rally for a minute--will we get an OutRun 3 some day?  They missed out on many parts of the world to include, Asia in particular (where the game was made, come on Yu Suzuki!). See OutRunners or (dare I say) Cruis'n World for more Asian places!

Failure to please a woman is a crime!!

I did it!  I beat the whole game!  JK, I used the "Entirety" code to unlock everything.  Create a license, then go back to edit it. Change your name to "ENTIRETY," press enter, then back out to cancel changes. Congratulations, you've unlocked everything. Works on all platforms.