Friday, November 30, 2012

More Sonic All-Stars Racing Stuff

It was a bad, bad day...but nevertheless, more Sega All-Stars Racing stuff!!!


About the difficulty patch.  Well, I'm not upset.  If it makes the game more accessible to people then fine.  I know it's cool to think "boohoo, they're pandering to casuals" but any way they can get more people to buy the game is fine by me. know what.  I didn't realize this until a week ago.  And that is the name of the game is NOT Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing: Transformed.  It's Sonic & All-Stars Racing: Transformed.  They took the "Sega" part out of the title and I didn't even know it.  Whatever, I will still call it "Sega All-Stars Racing" since I'm sick and tired of this "it's a Sanic gaem" bulls***.  Sega made three racing games in recent history with nothing but Sonic characters in them.  It's called Sonic Riders.  So quit trying to apply the Sonic Cycle or some crap like that to Sega All-Stars Racing already, sheesus.

HOW TO DO A FAST START.  Basically, follow this diagram that looks like a .wav file in a sound editor.  Just as the announcer begins to say a number (and when the screen goes black), tap the gas pedal (to correspond with the colors).  The exhaust flames should go from red to purple to blue to signal you're doing it correctly.  Then simply slam on the gas when he says go.  It's not tricky like Daytona USA's boost start (hold the gas at 6500 rpm's) so this one can be learned after a couple of tries.  NOTE the fast start applies with all three vehicles.  Even if you're playing Sky Sanctuary or NiGHTS levels, you can still do the fast start as the plane is rolling ahead (though there's no fade to help with the timing).

I'll probably post more tips later...I'm trying to get as much stuff off my mind now.

And another thing and I'll go ahead and say this.  Thank GOD for Joystiq.  I mean it, this site is 1,000,000,000 times better than Kotaku which blows ass.  They post a favorable review of the game (4.5 of 5 stars) as well as a link to the DLC character petition thread.  Screw you Kotaku, go post another story about an old man who took his pants off at a Japanese arcade, or something.

Also, I'm reading Sumo Digital's "Ask me questions" thread and I accrued a bit of knowledge.  Stupid stuff but here's something.  Originally, the Ages character was meant to be more than just the Hornet/Afterburner Jet/Dreamcast controller combo.  The Hornet would be one of many land vehicles such as the bike from Super Hang-On (in other words, every time you transformed to a land vehicle, you would get a random vehicle).  But memory reasons took that out so they stuck with just the Hornet.  That would've sucked since I like the Hornet and want to play as it all the time (not knocking the Super Hang-On bike).

Also there was going to be Phantasy Star and Crazy Taxi tracks but because of the space and city themes already in place (Sonic Colors and Jet Set Radio), they were cut.  Kind of sucks since there's many Sega franchises that hardly got any representation (I don't count obscure holograms from Race of Ages) but what can you do about it.

BTW, Alex Kidd is in the game.  Set your console clocks to Dec. 25 or later and he instantly becomes playable.  Not making this up.  Free DLC, thanks Sumo!

One more thing.  If you check out the license stickers, they have different names.  One is called "Scud Racer."  Another is called "Power Edition!"  I take it those are referring to Scud Race and Daytona 2: Power Edition, respectively.  I swear, with all these Sega racing references peppered throughout these Sumo games, I'm being teased left and right.  If they go make a Daytona USA 3 game without me, I'm going to go home and lock myself in a dark closet and regret I wasn't born earlier.

COMPLAINING TIME!  That is not to say the game is bad (it's great), but here are some things about the game I don't get:

1. No speedometer in the game.  I asked S0L why this is and his response was it was distracting and hard to get a scale of the world you're in anyway.  Personally, I think a speedometer would've helped a lot in determining how fast boosts carry you and what's the optimal boost pattern but eh...not having one in a racing game kind of sucks for me.

2. I don't get these mirrored tracks.  I know backwards tracks are out since nearly all of them are impossible to do in reverse (anything with a cliff/ramp of sorts).  But the way the game treats mirrored tracks as their own course when they're the same exact thing but you turn left instead of right (and vice versa), c'mon man.  There's 21 tracks in this game, not 42.  Racing backwards would be a challenge but racing mirrored is just meant to annoy you and if I could, I would never do a mirrored race seriously.  Yeah, that's my opinion.  Mirrored tracks also irritated me in Daytona USA XBLA but the game's still great so no deduction to the review score.

3. Also on the topic of time trials, why can't you race any of the three laps on any track?  For instance, the first, second, and third laps of Burning Depths (now my favorite track since everyone but me sucks at it and I like the music) are completely different but you can only time trial the third lap.  I know the water level changes but I don't see how hard it would be to disable the trigger so you keep doing the first/second lap over and over again.  Also see the Skies of Arcadia, Sky Sanctuary, Jet Set Radio levels...can't choose which track variation you like!  Oh well, S0L said some stuff about fewer options in this game...because the menus get cluttered and they have to test them all for quality.  Understandable.

4. Wish the game had different music to choose from.  Hearing the same song on each track kind of sucks after a while.

5. Also don't really like the slot machine "Bonus Chance" thing.  I seldom win (about 30% of the time) and when I do, the reward is hardly worth it (start with a free item).  Understandable, but I don't like how the tracks are scattered with coins which are basically useless in the long run...they're there to tease distract you from the current race you're on for what--a free ice cube at the start of the next race?  FYI, the max amount of coins you can have is 99 so once you've reached it, you might as well start using them.  They work for Grand Prix AND Online Races...

This thing's purpose: to teach kids the danger of gambling addiction.

6. Okay, sooooo...ONLINE PLAY!  At last, I get to show the world my skills (or lack thereof).  All I have to say is prepare for the s*** to hit the fan cause you're gonna get abused with ice cubes, tornadoes, and RC-XD's.  You thought playing against Expert CPU's was bad, here you're caught in a mosh.  Anyway, I'm playing as MeeMee (who sucks but I'm trying to level up all the characters) and collision physics get wonky at times...get hit by another guy and I get airborne in places you shouldn't.  Okay, I can live with that.  

But the ultimate WTF moment was when I was MeeMee on Roulette Road.  I handily completed my three laps about 15+ seconds ahead of the second place guy (I was pissed off and wanted to win).  However, I still kept driving.  Eventually the 30-second clock came on and time ran out.  The game said I DNF'ed and I lost 100 points off my rating.  Really now?

Also, two more funtastic moments as MeeMee, both on Graffiti City.  In the middle part of the track with the boosters on the ramps, well I got hit with a swarm just before the ramp and fell into a crack to my doom.  Okay, that sucks but it happens.  Anyway, I spawn in front of the boost ramp, hit it, but don't get enough speed to land the jump so I fall down AGAIN.  Sucks to be me!  Second part is on the downhill portion after the helicopter.  There's a swarm again and I hit one which is inevitable because the track is so narrow here.  I get stuck dangling on the pointy ledge as I floor it but can't move at all.  So guess what kids...time to commit suicide.  Back up into the pit, die, and respawn.  Wasted twelve seconds on this part too.  What a piece of s***.  I ALWAYS get in the flukiest wrecks too, I swear.

Other than that, to win you need to know the tracks inside and out (hence the numerous practice you got through World Tour mode), know how to use the items, and pray for a little luck while you're at it too.

7. Speaking of online play, the All-Star moves are a tad bit ridiculous.  There's some luck involved--if you happen to get one (and you seldom do) then you can get a nice boost.  But if you get one in second or third place, it can propel you into first with a cushy lead.  Kind of stupid, not as broken as the blue shells though.

8. I still don't get the Race of Ages track.  Is this what the inside of a Dreamcast looks like?  The land part is fairly "epic" as you're trying not to fall although there's no change in scenery there.  The air part of the track is way too vacant and straightforward, plus there's no Sega holograms there.  The water part is the coolest but I think the holograms are a cheap way to cover all of Sega's fan service bases.  Oh look, a statue of Ryo Hazuki.  Another statue of the Chu Chu's.  Another statue of Bonanza Bros. but all that does is make me sad they're not playable characters...  But that's just me.  I'm not feeling the level as much as others I guess.  Sonic Riders had some nostalgic stages like the Boulevard levels which do the old Sega vibe slightly better IMO. 

9. Menus are a tad bit slow to navigate through but w/e.  It can get annoying as it takes a few more seconds than usual to restart a failed mission...

10. Why is NiGHTS the car and not the driver???  Also, why doesn't Gilius's "car" have a steering wheel???

That's about it, game is fun, everyone please buy it if you haven't already.  Game sales are a bit underwhelming at the moment so go buy the damn game if you haven't already.  Wait for the Christmas rush to kick in--hope Sega is advertising the damn game.  Also those Model 2 fighting games we talked about earlier miraculously made their way state-side so that's good too, check 'em out if you need to beat the crap out of other polygonal players.

Damn, I'm still unemployed and I hate this NFL bulls***...I miss NASCAR.  Haters gonna hate...

Saturday, November 24, 2012

232 Stars, IT CAN BE DONE (All-Stars Racing Is Too Hard)

232 Stars.  Beat all the Grand Prix cups in 1st on Expert.  It's not impossible, people.  It only took me three days though most of it was grinding (being forced to play similar missions repeatedly).


The end of the World Tour, Thank God


When you get the last mod, the credits play again.  Hey, that's Steve and Gareth.  I know you, please hire me and we can work on Sega Racers Megamix!!!  Please reply to my e-mails!!!  DAMMIT!!!

Now, if there's one thing that has people fuming about the game, it's that the game is too hard on the hardest difficulties.  And not "hard" but just plain cheap.  Like the AI rubber-bands your ass and has 100% accuracy with weapons.  But this is a case of "you don't know what I've experienced, I saw X and Y happen, you can't dispute that."  And as usual, we draw up different conclusions about the game's AI and there's apparently NOTHING that we could do, say, or show that would change each other's minds.  But I'm going to say what I have to say anyway.

I question this claim the AI is broken because of the following:

* If these people claim to have witnessed rubber-banding on Expert, then how the hell did they even get into 1st place with an insurmountable lead for the AI to overcome?  Play a Cruis'n or Fast & Furious game in arcades and tell me that's not true rubber-banding.

* Because you get hit by a bunch of items doesn't mean the game's automatically broken.  SURPRISE, I've played the first game online as Jacky Bryant and have gone through streaks of being pinballed by all sorts of items thrown at me and I drop to last.  So the AI decides to fight fire with fire and all of a sudden, that's cheap?  For that reason, you're not 100% guaranteed to win any race because of the item aspect of the game.  You may get a Level 3 Boost, shot by an ice cube, fall into a pit, AAAAND IT'S GONE.  That's part of the game.  Go play Forza with ghosts on (can't hit each other).

* But maybe I'm too good at the game or something so I'm underestimating the game's difficulty.  I really don't claim to be a racing game pro like some think I am.  But I do "okay" to "good" at them.  Forza online is a hit-or-miss--I always lose to pros who play the game non-stop and have the best tuning setups.  I'm not close to getting WR's in Daytona 1/2 or Outrun 2.  Haven't even gotten into F-Zero GX for difficulty reasons.  And then there's Gran Turismo's licence tests.  So I'm playing GT4 and I want to unlock the Dome Zero and the Model T but I can't get all golds on the I-A and S license tests.  POLYPHONY DIGITAL BROKE THE GAME, IT'S TOO HARD...

* And even if the AI cheats...well, so what?  Some good games do this like Civilization V.  On harder levels, the AI starts with extra settlers, technologies, and happiness bonuses (to make up for the fact your CPU isn't Deep Blue).  In SASRT, it's possible to beat the game.  I did it, many others did it.  Each mission isn't an automatic win but if you perform well enough over a period of time, the ball will eventually bounce your way and you'll win. If this game were entirely luck based, then anyone can win but no, that's not happening. You will be forced to "know" the tracks and improve your technique. Sorry that it hurts to say for some people. You didn't start out playing Daytona USA or Outrun finishing in first from the start?  This has to be the first racing game in years where the AI doesn't just lay down and die and a few are apparently butt-hurt by that.

* Worst-case scenario.  If you are stuck in World Tour, then STOP PLAYING IT.  Go play something else and come back when you get better then you'll beat that mission on your first or second try.  I guarantee it.  And once you've unlocked all the characters you want, then you don't have to play that mode anymore!

Review-wise, the game is going good.  Still hovering in that 8-9 range which doesn't merit me going on rants.  But there's one review that sticks out (and really isn't even a review), it's the Kotaku article which answers the question "Should you play this game?" with a resounding NO.  Oh God, here we go again.  The thre main reasons for this bad review are the following:

1. BAWWWW THIS GAME IS TOO HARD -- Read above.  Wait, he can't even beat a B-class race?  C'mon, man!
2. I don't like boats or planes -- Sumo goes out of the way to add two new modes of transportation as opposed to Mario Kart's "look I'm driving on the bottom of a lake" and it sucks.
3. Track layouts don't require knowledge -- Try playing any racing game on tracks you've never seen before like Nurburgring or Complex String (from GT3).  You get better at any track you've played on multiple times.  That's common sense.

I suppose all these complaints indirectly bring up a good point and it is this--Sumo could've added a better "tutorial" to help you improve quickly.  Okay, there's always room to get better.  I'll probably drop tips in a future post.  But don't worry, Kotaku, there's always Forza and NFS to make you feel warm and fuzzy on the inside which are the best racing games ever!  Funny because the media treats Sega All-Stars Racing like it's meant for "fans only" but Forza and NFS are meant for "everyone."  Bulls***, everyone should play Sega All-Stars Racing.  Seriously though, I have a few things about the game to nit-pick about but I wouldn't say "Dirty Cheating AI" is one of my main points.

...whatever, I don't have anything else to say about the difficulty.  Try playing the demo on various difficulties and if it's so difficult you want vomit (even on Easy), then don't buy it.  Otherwise, please do!  Peace out.

EDIT: Looks like DarthS0L aka Steve Lycett said that he's releasing a patch that'll tone down the game's difficulty.  So those of you worried about the game being too hard, you're in luck.  HAHA, noobs...  (jk)

Thursday, November 22, 2012


Hornet Classic.....bitches.

You need 165 stars in the World Tour to unlock it.  It's very hard but took me a day & a half to do.  Thankfully you don't have to beat the whole game on the hardest difficulty to do it.

The "AGES" default stats (and every other character unlocked).

Hornet FTW!

The AGES' "driver" is a Dreamcast VMU.  Nope, not weird at all.

Very good character indeed...the Hornet's pit chief isn't the same VA as the original Daytona but it's close enough.  For the record, that's what the Hornet says out loud.  If you're passing by the Hornet, you may even hear the pit chief speaking!  The Dreamcast boat is also hilarious--it makes Dreamcast main menu noises ("bbbrrrrring!!!") and even the noise the console emits when loading the CD ("kzzzt-kzzzt").  Genius!  The Afterburner Jet says typical fighter pilot stuff.  Just weird piloting the F-14 Tomcat but not being able to fire missiles & stuff at will :/

I hate Traffic Attack, it's what you're forced to do in Hell.  Anyway, by sheer skill, memorization, and luck I managed to 4-star them all just to exorcise the demons and I never have to play those missions EVER AGAIN.

The game is very tough but there's the chance to go for 232 stars (4-star everything) for a few reasons...achievement points, unlock the last AGES mod for super speed, and bragging rights.  But more on that later.  Happy Thanksgiving!  Thanks to Sumo Digital and Sega on a job well done!  And thanks to the fans who signed the petitions cause now Segata Sanshiro and Ryo Hazuki are sitting cozy at 1800+ votes when the goal was just 1000 signatures per character!  And as always, a special thanks to the Armed Forces, Police Officers, Fire Fighters, and Emergency Personnel!  I'll check you guys out...later.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Gonna Be Busy Next Few Weeks

It's great we're getting this new Sega All-Stars Racing game but right now I've got a lot of other things on my mind.  See, I'm only going to be at my gaming school for less than a month before the doors are locked forever and odds are I'll never see my friends again outside the occasional awkward Skype/Steam chat.  As for the job search, it's not going that great.  I'm hoping I get to work on games I like but I'm embracing for the fact I won't.  When you're a rookie, your choices are incredibly limited.  I'm going to do some soul-searching in the meantime.  Probably less "OMG SEGA AND SUMO DIGITAL ARE THE BEST" cheerleading too.  We'll see what happens.  I may return to unlock the Hornet but whatever...go play Sega All-Stars Racing, vote for DLC, have a good time dudes, I'm happy for everyone.

Team Fortress 2 Characters Can't Drive

Why are they in Sega All-Stars Racing again???

That should be their vehicle--the hod rod from Half-Life 2.

If you listen closely, you might catch some Jet Set Radio music.

Only a matter of time until Sega All-Stars Racing characters are in Garry's Mod...

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Sega All-Stars Racing Demo & F1 Races

Oh man, I'm having a hard time making posts that follow up the Hornet.  BUT, we gotta keep talking about stuff!  Let's do it!

I should mention that the petitions that I mentioned last post are still legit as far as I'm concerned.  I mean, I know that these Internet "patishuns" for stuff like "Sega please let Yu Suzuki make Shenmue 3" that fail so no one bothers to sign.  But this petition will supposedly be read by Sumo Digital themselves.  And if DarthS0L is playing us, okay fine, so let's reach 1000 signatures for Ryo and Segata and show him the fans can get it done and make him eat crow.  So go sign now!  Sheesus...

Also, it's worth mentioning that people are using the abbreviation "SART" to describe this game.  Okay, Sega All-Stars: Transformed?  Plus the word "SART" rhymes with another bodily function I try not to talk about.  Thanks guys!


But first, Formula 1 Grand Prix in Texas going on right now!!!  I'm proud to be an American!!!  It's good because for once, the race airs during the day rather than 3 am or some time when I should be sleeping (but am not thanks to the Internet).

The track looks vaguely like a gun.  In Texas, they should just go all out and make a track in the shape of a revolver.  Or a shotgun.  Or a horse.  Or a bull.  Or a cowboy hat.  Or f*** it--how about the Dallas Cowboys star--Houston Texans fans would be pissed but they aren't the most valuable NFL franchise so they have no say, I'm sorry.

Also last race of the NASCAR Sprint Cup season today and then there will be no more NASCAR for three months... :(


But now for what everyone is here for and that's Sonic & Sega All-Stars Racing: Transformed DEMO opinions.  There's also a Need for Speed: Most Wanted -- A Criterion Game demo too that I downloaded as well for masochistic reasons.  So here I have a good game and a bad game.  Which one should I play first?  I got a radical idea.  Let's play Sega All-Stars Racing and uninstall Need for Speed!  It's a win-win!

Demo only has Sonic and the Panzer Dragoon and Golden Axe tracks.  Personally I'm not too fond of either because they're too dreary for my tastes but they're not "happy" franchises so it's to be expected.  But each track is quite massive.  Like Split-Second (oh geez), the tracks change each lap.  First lap of Panzer Dragoon was all land.  Second lap is land and water.  Third lap is land and air.  I'm surprised by how much room you have to maneuver in the air parts so you don't feel confined in the planes.

The game runs fast especially in the car while doing drifts.  The 30 FPS does hurt a bit but maybe it's because I haven't played a non-60 FPS game in a long time.  BTW, I should mention that while I tear up the road parts (just like the first Sega All-Stars Racing), the water and air parts are a big WTF.  I know you can drift in those parts but it's much harder to gauge where you'll end up.  All I can say is stop trying to drift in a straight in these parts.  I've always been a land guy so this is new.

There's two career mode races: the first is a traditional race at Panzer Dragoon.  You can finish it with one, two, or three stars--three stars being the hardest.  Took me a few tries to win trying to figure out the tracks.  Then the Golden Axe boost challenge comes up (go through boosts before time runs out) and all I have to say is that one's annoying as s***.  I hear to unlock the Hornet, you need to get 165 stars.  All I have to say is that only the pros will unlock the Hornet.  Funny they call it the Ages car...because it takes AGES to unlock.  I'm hoping there's an "unlock all things" DLC cause as cheap as it is, I'd rather play through the career as the Hornet from the start.

BTW, you can pick "tuning setups" for each of the characters and for Sonic, the default one has high top speed but low handling.  So I'm trying to win in the "expert" car from the start.  It's like driving the Phantom or the McLaren F1 on your first run.  So if navigating through the air/water is so hard then I'll have to pick another character or setup!

That's it.  Somehow, the purist in me wishes I was just playing a 60 FPS land-only game but that takes nothing away from this game.  Review-wise, an 8 or better is justified IMO.  Let's get the game in the mail and play the hell out of it...while I wait for job offers to come through the e-mail.  Yeah, later....

Saturday, November 17, 2012


Stop right there, you must read this or your family, friends, and pets will die in a fire:

I'll set you a challange. Without any policing from the SUMO or SEGA crew, if you can all agree on three characters by the 1st of December and prove there is sufficient interest of at least 1000 unique people *per* character, I will present the result to SEGA. I can't promise anything will happen as a result, but since you're starting it... - DarthS0L

EDIT: The means for character voting has changed.  GO TO THIS THREAD and there are links to petitions for each character.  Pick the characters you want, sign 'em, and that's it!  You can sign as many petitions as you want.  Here's Ryo's petition.  And Segata's petition.  Look, you don't even need to make a Sega message board account anymore to vote.  Just go there, it takes 15 seconds and you'll do us all a favor!!!

I personally petitioned for the elusive Daytona USA 2 transformer, made up of the Scorpio Car, the Chums Gum Boat, and the Phantom Jet.  What...Daytona 2 needs some love too?  And Scud Race.  And Sega Rally.  Damn Hornet steals all the attention.  Too bad my idea didn't go through.

But THERE'S MORE SECRET CHARACTERS!  These characters are on the disc but they had to be hacked to get the videos you see here.  There's only twenty-three slots on character select screen.  Wait, are these guys platform exclusives or are they on-disc DLC?  If they are DLC, why Sumo, why???  Well, you paid $40 for the game, just shut up and let Sumo take your money.

Jolly good show, mate!  I'm in Sega All-Stars Racing, that's massive!!!

There's gonna be a bunch of flak taken for this character. I mean, a FOOTBALL MANAGER character??? Fantastic! I am actually not bothered by this. Everyone loves British accents. And that silver Rolls Royce is pretty cool. Notice the helmet? You were never meant to see this bloke's eyes and hair. Couldn't see them on the box art, couldn't see them in this game.

I was going to make a funny joke about being in first place but that's the second stereotype I played up in this post and I don't want to blow it.  Well, everyone loves Japanese samurai dudes...the car's pretty cool, made out of wood like a 70's station wagon but if you're gonna put an Asian in the game...why not Ryo?  Or Segata Sanshiro?  SUMO IS A DISGRACE TO SEGA!!! 

It's Alex Kidd, I have nothing funny to say about him.

No, Sumo, that's wrong.  We need the Sniper...he actually drives in his "Meet the ___" video.

Once Gaben takes over, he'll make his own Valve kart racer.  And for the first time in the History of the World, Reddit Gaming will actually care about a racing game (DAE PLAY THIS GAEM???).

Also, watch out guys, pieces of Billy Hatcher, Jacky Bryant, and Zobio & Zobiko were found in the code.  I know Billy was cut (S0L said so) but these guys may be set for future DLC.  Yes, they can bring Billy back, I believe it!  Just vote in the thread above, buy the game, and rate it 10/10 on all the terrible websites like GameFAQs, please.

EDIT: So guys on the Sega forums are spamming links to the thread on various forums, including Kotaku and Reddit.  Kotaku is a joke of a gaming site, only post about bad aspects of Japanese culture, snack food, Reddit reposts, and the occasional article about how awesome of a gamer you are because you play Assassin's Creed/Portal/Halo/Minecraft.  Reddit cares more about stuff that doesn't even deserve to make the front page on /r/midlyinteresting, such as this:


Thursday, November 15, 2012

!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1 DAYTONA !1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1


Even your pit chief talks to you!!!!!!

Now...if this game just had Ryo Hazuki, Segata Sanshiro, and Jacky Bryant, it would be THE GREATEST RACING GAME EVER.  Well, close to it.  I will pay Sumo Digital a large sum of money to add those characters to the game (assuming they aren't in already).  Like $100 per character.  I AM DEAD SERIOUS.  THIS GAME IS LOOKIN GOOD, 90% OF THE WAY THERE, WE JUST NEED THE EXTRA 10% TO PUSH IT ACROSS THE FINISH LINE!!!!!!  LET'S DONATE MONEY TO SUMO DIGITAL FOR MORE CHARACTERS AND THREE-SEVEN SPEEDWAY DLC!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shit, I need to sit down...oh wait, that's right, I am sitting down.  Well what am I going to do now?  I woke up due to a stomachache so I'm gonna throw up.  Certainly not sleeping.  We're gonna party like it's 1994 with awesome music!!!!!!!!  It's the Dreamcast version but who cares???????

Oh yeah, encore performance!!!!!

I love you guys, no homo.

EDIT: So it just dawned on me that there's one thing amiss--the Hornet's tires aren't nearly as fat.  Well it was also that way in Daytona 2.  BAH, CLOSE ENOUGH.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Sega Racer Timeline First Draft AT LAST

I know in a few days, Sega All-Stars Racing: Transformed will be among us and it'll surely consume much of our attention.  But before then, I want to get as many on the queue things out of the way.

This is the first draft of the timeline I made.  It's HUGE.  This image below is just a thumbnail.

Now, if you want to see the large timeline, CLICK HERE.  It's 2.9 mb and that's after converting to a .jpg with good (not maximum) quality so I don't want to dump this on you people.  Yet I had to make the image 3000x4000 because it's the only way to fit so many games without the images being too small to read.

The pic is uploaded to deviantART.  Click here and favorite the submission.  But since I already described the timeline in the deviantART submission, I'll just copy & paste it here:


I spent about 30-40 hours on this over the course of a month.  It's a list of (most) every relevant racing game since the beginning of video games.  From 1976 to 2012.  The original timeline is 3000x4000 size so click to zoom in twice for the best view.

I should mention I'm a huge fan of Sega's racing games so the original purpose of the graph was to chart Sega racing games only.  Then I branched out and decided to include some other racing games for a point of reference.  Then I included video game consoles.  Then even more racing games.  Now there's a few hundred racing games on there because I'm obsessed like that.

As for how this chart works, I basically thought up as many racing games as I could.  The usual suspects like Daytona USA, OutRun, Sega Rally, Need for Speed, Gran Turismo, Mario Kart, etc.  Then I looked at some more racing game lists here and there for for more recommendations.  After going through that many racing games, I may have missed some.  If I forgot some famous racing game, please let me know and I'll get to it.  Sorry if I screwed up.

Also I should mention that I'm only looking for semi-relevant racing games.  Go to GameFAQs and type in "gp" or "f1" in the search bar and scroll through the list.  Should all of those be included here when you've only heard of maybe 5-10% of those?

I've also favored arcade racing games which is why there's a couple of obscure racing games on there.  Many of the Sega racing games are arcade titles so comparing them to other arcade titles makes sense.

Now for the dates and the pictures.  Basically, I have a game I want to add to the timeline.  I look for a box art/title screen pic, chop it, and put it in the chart according to the year I was provided with.  Some games I looked up the year on GameFAQs which proves to be inaccurate at times.  Other games I look up on Wikipedia which seems more accurate.  The point is if the date is wrong then please let me know and I can amend it.

Though some dates are major judgment calls--like Gran Turismo 4 was released in Japan on Dec. 28, 2004 and everywhere else months later.  So should I list GT4 under 2004 even though it really isn't?  Same thing with Mario Kart 64--Japanese release was Dec. 14, 1996, NA release was Feb. 10, 1997, EU release was June 24, 1997.  So there's some judgment calls that had to be made.  I still may be wrong with the dates but at least give me "proof" that I'm not.

One more thing--I included Grand Theft Auto and Saints Row in the list purely because driving is a huge part of the gameplay.  Those technically don't count as "racing games" but oh well.  If their presence is too bothersome, I can take them out.

I appreciate all comments.  If this is a big deal and I get a lot of suggestions, I'll make it look much more polished.  Until then, here's the first version.  Adios.

Oh and I hope this is acceptable for deviantART even though it really isn't "artwork."  Maybe I'll move it to scraps then.  Isn't all art subjective?

Copyright all these games not to me.  So many to list...


Like most projects I engage in, this one took much too long so I hope it's worthwhile.  If only to highlight Fonz, heh...

Sega All-Stars Racing 2 Spoilers?

Sonic and Sega All-Stars Racing: Transformed is currently sitting in stores, waiting for the release date.  Except some stores have already started selling pre-release copies which means there's people among us playing the game.  Um, SPOILER ALERT!!!

First of all, a lot of people are running their asses on the Internet right now.  So I'm going to give you a tentative feel to what I know.  This is mostly from browsing around the official Sega All-Stars Racing forum.  Here goes (once again, SPOILERS):


* Every character that was in Sega Superstars Tennis EXCEPT Alex Kidd is in.  EDIT: No, that's false, Alex Kidd IS IN.  That means MeeMee (Super Monkey Ball), Gum (Jet Set Radio), and Pudding (Space Channel 5).  All girls.

* There is a Burning Rangers track.

* There is a House of the Dead track.

* There is a Billy Hatcher track.

* There is a "Race of Ages" track that is similar to Mario Kart's Rainbow Road and features references to many Sega IPs.  No idea if there's any references to Daytona or Virtua Racing.  I doubt it but we'll see.

* The following characters are probably not playable: Chu Chus, Zobio & Zobiko, Jacky Bryant, Opa Opa, Bonanza Bros, Vectorman, Toejam & Earl, Big the Cat, Billy Hatcher, Bayonetta, Banjo-Kazooie.

* Sunshine Tour, Future Shibuya, Death Egg, and Roulette Road are the only tracks from the first Sega All-Stars Racing to be in Transformed.

* EDIT: There's two Jet Set Radio tracks, the one from the first game and a brand new one.

* There is a third 3rd-party character besides Danica and Wreck-It Ralph that hasn't been found.  And it is, according to some file names on the disc...Team Fortress 2 Spy/Heavy/Pyro?  I can't make this s*** up if I tried. I think this is total crap but at this point, I don't discount anything.  EDIT: There's also "references" to a Football Manager character, Total War character, and Alex Kidd just like the TF2 characters.  It makes no sense, I know.  EDIT: The TF2 "character" is most likely a PC exclusive character, makes sense if this is released on Steam...

* Then there's some "ultimate fanservice Sega character" that hasn't been mentioned.  It takes a very long time to unlock.  According to some guy's BS, it's....Taro Sega from Segagaga?  He's from some 2001 Japan-only Dreamcast game that looks like Phantasy Star but with lots of Sega character cameos.  Now like I said, this is probably crap so I'm not holding my breath on this.  I think Segata Sanshiro would make a better pick anyway but what do I know.  Taro Sega makes a slight amount of sense anyway from a fanservice point.  FORGET THIS, IT'S WRONG, this guy's full of it.

* EDIT: BRAND NEW, THE EXCLUSIVE CHARACTER is possibly the "Segabot," a robot constructed of various Sega things such as the Dreamcast VMU, the Afterburner Jet, and the Hornet from Daytona USA.  OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It totally makes sense, Hornet = land, Afterburner = plane, VMU, no Dreamcast controller = boat (well it's shaped like one).  I'll believe it once I see it.

* Segata Sanshiro exists somewhere in the game's code but most likely as a cameo.

* EDIT: Looks like Billy Hatcher was the 30th character but he got cut from the game.

* Now about our beloved Ryo Hazuki.  I don't think he's a playable character after all.  He's a hologram that appears in the Race of Ages track.  Same with a couple of other guys like Bonanza Bros. and Opa Opa.

Look, I'm not going to say anymore since I think everyone's full of crap.  I'm going to get the game in the mail in a week and then we'll play it and have lots of fun.  But about Ryo, I think it sucks that they dropped him.  He had a good showing in the first Sega All-Stars Racing but that's it.  Riding Ito's motorcycle and the forklift.

I think the main reason why Ryo didn't make the cut is because in the realm of this game, I just don't see how the bike or forklift could transform into a boat or plane.  It makes sense for guys like Joe Musashi, Vyse, and Gilius cause they come from fantasy worlds (or zones) with all these elaborate tools, gadgets, weapons, magic and stuff.  But Ryo is not a cartoon character, he's some average joe on a bike so it was crazy enough he was in the first game but the second was too much apparently.  Or it could be because no one gives a damn about Shenmue anymore so screw it, Ryo is gone?

As for all the girl characters, Danica included, I think it's ridiculous that some series like Super Monkey Ball would get two characters (who was stoked to see MeeMee in the game anyway?) but they needed more female characters so there you go.  As for all the people complaining about Danica taking a spot, I say this.  I think she's a totally unique character with a unique vehicle.  Yeah she's "realistic" like Ryo but between race cars, Go Daddy, and Hot Wheels, I think she has character traits appropriate for this game.  She also fills the quota of female characters.  Bayonetta would make a great female character except for the whole "being in a M-rated game" thing so that's unfortunate.  If you think someone like Ryo or Segata Sanshiro is more deserving than Danica, fine, I don't doubt it.  But see the forest from the trees...Sumo probably knows something we don't.

Speaking of which, this situation is awfully reminiscent of when the Super Smash Bros. Brawl roster was leaked.  I was there for that crap.  I hated the game but I wanted to know what 30-something characters were in the game, sort of like Willy Wonka and the Golden Tickets--you were stricken with curiosity.  And I saw first-hand the guys who wept over the absences of potential characters like Mewtwo, Issac, Ridley, Megaman, Geno, etc. so it sucks.  But it's impossible for these AAA games to cater to every single person so I'll leave it at that.  Adding one character to a game is hard enough.  Adding twenty-five is takes AGES.  So sorry they couldn't add 26, 27, or 28 instead of 25.

There'll probably be many complaints about this game, let's get by them, see what we can take away from the game such as the GAMEPLAY which looks solid!  Pray for DLC which I'll buy it if Sega offers any but they have really shied away from DLC lately so it's gonna be tough.  Just don't get on this "we need 100 more Sonic characters and tracks" bandwagon or I'm going to snap.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Two Shoutouts To Great SEGA Gentlemen

I always come on this blog and call out enemies of the Sega Nation all the time.  Yet I should flip it around and mention those guys who do the Sega Nation well.  Here goes.

One, I'm on Reddit Gaming again, and believe me when I say Reddit Gaming (and Reddit in general) sucks.  But I glance over it daily to get a pulse of gamer culture at that moment.  And here's the top story with 900+ comments (that's a frickin hell of a lot)--a guy puts together a "gaming house" full of consoles, PCs, and arcade cabinets.  Okay, sweet, this is a good Reddit Gaming post so I can't complain.  Really need to check out the gallery.

Guess what he's got inside?  MUTHA EFFIN SCUD RACE TWIN CABINET???

A Reddit Commentator -

I wonder how secure is this house. Now that probably every burglar in the world knows that so much stuff is inside, it's pretty tempting to steal all this shit.

Anyway amazing setup, i liked arcade racing machines the most, also i twitched seeing those cds, no matter if they're the cheapest of all of this, he should treat them with respect :P

Another thing that bothered me was screen sizes, shouldn't all be the same? or the owners screen is the biggest and you, little pawns, can have those tiny ones?

I hope to see more photos :D

Thank you so much Reddit user Citizen_Gamer for posting pics of this and doing your part to get Sega Racers a little more exposure.  Nice house and thanks for having that friend of yours making the world a better arcade at a time.  I don't have a Reddit account (and I really don't want one...that site's all about being upvoted) but I wish I could put in a good word for him.

AND THEN, there's this...this is on SEGAbits, same site that had DarthSOL on the podcast to do Q&A'S. Well they did a brief story on Danica's 14th place finish and posted the links to Danica's Sega car gallery and a Fox Sports race recap.  Funny thing is I referenced the same exact two links in my blog post and I don't think these guys are digging around for obscure Danica stuff either.  So is it possible they read my blog?  I'm not mad, obviously I look up to them for Sega news and that's great if we got a little webring going cause us Sega fans need to stick together lest we get cannibalized by this stupid gaming media.  But it's cool bro, good job with the short story and it's great that people know more about Danica's race, that's all.

Oh yeah, one more thing.  Also on Reddit Gaming, there's a classic Sega Genesis plug-in-and-play console with 80 games already built in to the console.  Supposedly $30 bucks at Best Buy, Rite Aid, any generic store.  I mean, I hear from one or two people it's crummy but others say it's alright so I can't attest to its quality.  The packaging looks okay so it doesn't look like a Chinese knockoff like the "Greatstation 3."  So I wanna let you know there's a new Sega console floating around out there in stores so keep your eyes peeled on it.  It's not a Dreamcast 2 but it'll do for now.

Speaking of which...Dreamcast 2 coming out in a month.  ERMAHGERD GUYS I CAN'T WAIT.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Me In The Mornings

If I were a hero chao with bunny ears...

Alarm clock set to blare terrible pop/rap music in the late morning (10 am, lazy ass me)...BLAM, BAD AUTO-TUNE SINGING TO GENERIC 4/4 BEATS THAT IDIOTS LISTEN TO!!!

Hit snooze twenty times in a row until guilt takes over.

I get up and do stuff now.

Lawl, I look like Sam.  Or is it Max...I forget. 

NASCAR Ass-Kicking

Everyone who watches NASCAR knows I'm going to cover this so here goes.

To set the stage, Jeff Gordon (#24) and Clint Bowyer (#15) had a bit of a rivalry going on for months.  Late in the race, Gordon and Bowyer rub cars and Gordon's car is subsequently damaged.  Enraged and blaming Bowyer for deliberately hitting him, Gordon slows down and waits for Bowyer before hitting him again, sending Bowyer and two innocent drivers into the wall.  Bear in mind that Bowyer was 3rd in the Chase standings and had he finished strong here, he had an outside shot at winning the Chase championship next race at Miami-Homestead.  But no--Gordon took Bowyer out of the Chase altogether.  Over the radio, Gordon said he deliberately hit Bowyer.  What happened was Gordon getting ambushed by Bowyer's team and Bowyer running to yell at Gordon.  In other words, it was like a monkey f***ing a football so you must watch the whole video.

"That was a real act of a champion."
5 Hour Energy.  When you gotta whip someone's ass.

This is not the first or last time this has happened (here's some rubbin & racin).  I don't know what to say.  I still stand by what I said before and that is race car driving is the most frustrating of all the competitive events.  Well Jeff Gordon, a four-time championship winner, had flushed his reputation down the drain, at least for the moment.  Over one stupid thing.   Could've thrown a brick through Bowyer's house window or spike his coffee (Dumb & Dumber style) but no, had to wreck cars.  And this is an interesting story but in a Jerry Springer/Maury way.  It's not good and it makes us look like a bunch of idiots.  I know I mentioned "vigilante justice" and how Bowyer supposedly had it coming to him, but this is embarassing and Gordon should get his ass parked for the last race of the season, maybe more.  Goodbye AARP Drive to End Hunger!  Now old people will starve.

EDIT: Hey look, here's Brad the Champ cursing out Gordon and Bowyer.  Brad explains the difference between racing hard and racing stupid.  Well said.  This is Brad's Chase to lose and two idiots are taking the moment away from him.  Warning: Profanity, but who cares.

Hilarious, I'm watching Speed Channel and there's a Hendrick Motorspots 200 Win Special, crowning Jeff Gordon's ass.  Yet, at the same time, Speed's airing the Kurt Busch: Outlaw Special.  So basically, according to Speed, Jeff Gordon = good, Kurt Busch = bad.  My how the tables have turned.  I can only imagine how the next episode of the Michael Waltrip Racing Special will turn out.  Also, why is everything on TV a "special" anyway?

So the race was red-flagged with a G-W-C finish (basically two laps to decide a winner).  After sitting on your ass for some amount of time watching these idiots fight, the race goes on.  Our beloved Danica Patrick hits the wall on the first lap and starts limping to the finish line.  No yellow flag!  Somehow Danica's car drops invisible oil (again) and this causes a few cars to spin out and ignite going across the finish line.  Brilliant finish.

In other words, NASCAR is now about a bunch of s*** blowing up.  I almost feel ashamed especially how everyone was cheering on Jimmie Johnson to crash and not get his 6th Chase win (which is the case as it's now Brad's chase to lose).  Eh, if Richard Petty and Dale Sr. could win 7 championships, who said Jimmie can't win 6?  I made this quote up: "Everybody loves a winner.  Everyone hates a repeat winner."  Stop hating on successful people already, sheesus.  Wait, I changed my mind, I don't care what happens to Johnson.  Also, as much as I hate Burnout, I'd much rather you take out your aggression in that game than in real-life.  Enough of the Haterade, NASCAR sucks.

... Okay, I'll leave with one video.  Watch this guys, even if you screw up and are disliked by everyone, there is hope for redemption.  The Darrell Waltrip Experience.

EDIT AGAIN: Just some stupid crap that went down.  So the first Jeff Gordon-Clint Bowyer video I embedded was taken down due to copyright.  From a YouTube user called "imJustTheGOAT."  Who then proceeded to upload the same clip again under his account.  I presume this guy doesn't own NASCAR footage so why is he taking down other NASCAR clips and re-uploading them under his account?  Just to stroke his massive ego?  Stupid YouTube, I can't believe they allow this crap.  Ruining websites with bad videos and getting accounts suspended for copyright infringement from guys who don't even own the copyright, what a piece of s***.

Friday, November 9, 2012

Another Super Sprint Clone

So here's a flash game I've had in my Bookmarks for way too long.  Turns out that emulating Super Sprint is the way to go for avid racing game fans.  Sure, this one's not terrible but not great.  You play as the red ant...err, car (another one of those "you're the red car and you're stuck with it" games).  Hold space for gas, press left and right arrows to turn.  Not much else to it.

Steering is weird.  Unlike the original Super Sprint or my remake, there's no drifting at all.  So it takes a little while to get used to turning on a dime.  Oh yeah, if you touch the walls, you instantly explode.  The explosion sound is quite satisfying but it's nauseating to think the walls are instant death.  At least the computers will occasionally touch the walls too so you're not alone.  Also, the car is going slow enough to make it somewhat easy although going slow is just boring, heh.

The AI cars are pretty cheap.  There's always one or two cars that slingshot into the lead and are just faster than you and there's nothing you can do about it.  Thankfully, you must finish 3rd or better to stay alive (you have 3 lives, lose them all and the game's over).  Just like RC Pro Am.

There's also chevron turbo boosters, intersections, bridges,upgrades, and other crazy s*** like checkered flag props  Yet there's no wrenches, oil slicks, or tornadoes so it's not a true Super Sprint game, eh?  The 3-second music loop isn't the worst but it's pretty bad.  Not as bad as the previous Flash racing game I reviewed but still, this one's stupid enough to waste 5 minutes on.

Sonic The Hedgehog Dissected!

Hey, what's up guys!  Typical Call of Duty/"Let's Play" Youtuber intro.  So I want to talk about Sonic the Hedgehog.  Anyway, I'm on deviantArt looking at furry porn fan art and whoop, what do ya know--I run into some Sonic flash movies.  This is from a guy named Roger aka "Rogerregorroger" from the Netherlands, home of windmills, the Nintendo 64 champs and marijuana legalization before it was cool.  All of his "Sanic Gaem in X minutes" videos are already on YouTube:

Well, maybe you find them hilarious, maybe not.  But there's more!  I suggest you check out Roger's "Dissecting Sonic" series of Flash movies.  To my knowledge, they're only on deviantArt.  Each one only takes 5 or 6 minutes to watch but you should watch all eight eleven in order.

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 2 of Part 11  WHEEEEE!!!!

The reason I bring these up is because it makes you think about Sonic games in a much different light.  Most of what is mentioned has to do with the story & characters as opposed to gameplay.  But here's a few things I learned that I basically agree with:

* You talk about Sonic characters and you will always get a bunch of haters, "no more of Sonic's friends," so to speak.  But most every video game series has a huge cast of characters (see Mario for instance) and they always get away with it.  So what is Sonic doing wrong?  Because Sonic was a character with weaknesses.  Sonic is fast, Tails is smart, Knuckles is strong, Amy is sociable.  They just worked together.  But post Sonic Adventure 2 (when most agree the series took a huge dip), they turned Sonic into a character with no weaknesses whatsoever.  Sonic shows up, kills everything, and cracks a stupid joke.  Eggman is never on par with Sonic as he has become the gag villain for too long.  All other characters are tacked on just for fan service.  People aren't complaining about the characters--they're complaining about the characters being used incorrectly.  Cheesy voice acting & dialogue doesn't help either.


* Sonic Adventure 2 debateably has the best Sonic story for the 3D games.  Even if it's in cheesy "stuff just happens" Sonic fashion, I agree with this.  The game's excitement peaks and drops like a good movie should as new information is revealed at regular intervals.  Sonic needs help and shows emotions besides "cocky and in control."  The characters are actually doing stuff and events pay off in the future and make for a satisfying story.  Meanwhile, a lot of modern Sonic games like Secret Rings, Unleashed, and Colors usually have the characters stand around exchanging time-wasting dialogue and the action only peaks near the end when you fight a boss that you saw at the beginning of the game, spoiling the surprise and making it less exciting.

* As for gameplay, this is addressed in Part 8.  Some people compare Sonic to Mario and say "if Mario can do 3D platforming, why can't Sonic?"  Well Sonic has always gone a step above Mario in terms of obstacles such as the loops, the City Escape truck chase, the Final Chase rails, etc.  Meanwhile, all Mario has to do is have Mario run around the world jumping off stuff.  Not that what Mario does is bad or that bad Sonic gameplay is excusable, but it makes you think twice about why Sonic Team chose to program their games the way they did.

Go ahead and watch the videos if you haven't already.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Danica's 14th Place Finish (Post-Race Stuff)

Well, Danica finished 14th place in her one and only Sega car debut at Texas.  Here are some low-quality pics on RaceBuddy and the First Row Sports stream I took (click to blow 'em up):

The race, at least as of now, was a let down.  Danice started 8th, dropped to 12th, then made it back up to 5th as she ran laps as fast as the leader.  But then, with 70 laps to go, her right front tire shredded and she had to pit out of sequence.  Also some of the pit crew changes to her car slowed her down a bit, or something.  So she barely squeaked out a 14th place finish as she held off faster cars as much as she could on old tires.  For a second, I thought Danica could actually win but in typical Sega fashion, things didn't work out in the end.  I know it's crazy to expect a win but she couldn't even "make it to Victory Lane" (top 3) or even crack the Top 10 so it was a "meh" performance.  Maybe I am being pessimistic but she was doing great halfway there but couldn't keep it up to the end.

There wasn't much Sonic & Sega All-Stars pimpage on TV.  I really wonder if the NASCAR crowd even cares about Sega or Danica anyway.  What did Sega really gain out of Danica's car?  If there is one good thing to take away, it's that Sega got a little face time and that Danica finished the race without a scratch on the car.  That shredded tire incident was probably a miracle (watching the race live on TV, there's so much going on at once so you never know about those things until much later).  Our Danica fandom unfortunately ends here.  She's fulfilled her Sega quota and she'll go sponsor whatever dumb products they throw at her.  Next, we wait for the actual Sega All-Stars Racing game to be released then deal with the idiotic reviewers next.  Someday, Sega will make it back to the NASCAR oval and we will win again.  Today's not that day.  Until then, be proud that Danica did "okay."

I know some will question why I made a big deal out of this.  Why it was a red letter day to me.  Hey, how often do you see "SEGA" printed on a stock car?  Sega racing fan, put the clues together, now you know why it was so important.  Even if the outcome was probably so significant regardless of what happened.  It makes a feel good story anyway.

Was a beautiful car too...shame she couldn't win in it.  Oh poor Sega...  That's just the way it is...some things will never change.

BTW, Danica reminding you about Daylight Savings tonight.  Finally, I get that extra hour.  Now go drive the Tissot Swiss Watches car and get outta here...

Unless there's some Danica post-race news that's worth posting, I'll probably go on the down low for the next few days because of the Presidential Election.  Once that passes over, I will return and talk about stupid crap no one cares about yet again.  Oh, and I will also blow up my website and fix it in the meantime (maybe).  Laters.

BTW, LSU just blew the game to Alabama in typical Les Miles fashion.  I swear, LSU will always be Bama's bitch.  As someone from LA, it's sad but true.