Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Binary Domain Vs. Porn, The Choice Is Yours

Look at this--well, no; don't read the crap Kotaku article--read this instead, it's 100000x times better.  Slipped through my fingers.

Toshihiro Nagoshi, born in 1965, left his home at 15 (1980) due to family problems.  He wanted to make movies more than anything in the whole world!  So he got a film degree.  But the jobs in Toyko sucked--it was either be a lackey assistant director or porno director.  So THANKFULLY Nagoshi chose neither, preferring to mope around the house playing the Famicom (aka NES) give to him by his girlfriend during his college days.  So then he magically got a job at Sega, made Virtua Racing at 27 then Daytona USA at 29, got a tan, and the rest was history.

The fact that he wanted to be a film director first and foremost is tale-telling...maybe the man doesn't like simple arcade games...he wants to make "movie games" like Yakuza and Binary Domain.  Oh $#!*...put the pieces together.  Nagoshi's gone for good.  But how does someone go from film to game design like that?  This Wiki entry sucks and tells me nothing.  Supervisor over Shenmue...AW HELL NAW...

Would've been great if he had harped on Daytona USA more, but of course not...it was a brief piece that mostly talked about Yakuza & the Japanese quake.  Okay, but 17 years after Daytona USA's release, I highly doubt he was going to write a memoir on it.  I've already verbally beaten the crap out of him over his ignorance of his Daytona legacy so that's not new.  But Daytona USA over bukkake, ok that's a wise choice... (woah, look out kids)

"I know you still hate me, Eric."

OH, but there's more!  We know the background story for Binary Domain (pics included!!!), Nagoshi's new sparkling masterpiece now that's he forsaken racing games for good.  They even gave you a new trailer which I'm don't want to embed but I'm gonna anyway!!!

TURRIBLE STORY.  Here goes:

In 21st Century Tokyo, global warming (F*$% SHOULD'VE RODE OUR BIKES INSTEAD) has caused oceans to rise and new, futuristic cities were built on top of the dilapidated, old cities.  The rich live in the new cities and the poor live in the old cities.

Hot damn, it's that level from Sonic Riders!!!

In the ghetto...TRYIN TA STAY ALIVE...

The Amada Company was jerking off by ignoring Geneva conventions which banned robots.  Now you have robots running around like people but it's okay because people were too busy partying at rave clubs to even care.  Then in 2080, they somehow got really pissed off, ripped off their human-like faces (Ethan Hunt-style no doubt) and started killing everyone for no reason.

WARNING: Loud video



G**-DAMN ROBOTS!!!

Then you have these action heroes which will purge the world of robots and then we will quit pissing around on Facebook and Twitter and go outside, dancing and prancing through green pastures...

I am so preeetty!!

OH WAIT, now for the clincher--due to deep philosophical crap, all human beings turn into robots instead of the other way around.  DUN-DUN-DUN!  The end.  Give him an Oscar for this "interactive" film!

The story could be worse.  Instead of robots, it could be a massive supercomputer that kills everyone on earth except for five people that are incessantly teased and tortured, turning those who try to commit suicide into slugs...oh wait, there is a game like that already.

I know the Sega faithful will be stoked over it...kind of like their enthusiasm for Captain America and Total War which came out of nowhere other than that it had the Sega logo on it.  Me?  I'll be a bitter scrooge, you know it.  Gimme Shenmue 3 already, sheesus...

There's a silver lining in all this...if Nagoshi won't make another Daytona game, then it means that I WILL and it'll be better than Nagoshi could do himself...Sega Victoly again.  Farewell, Nagoshi, off to the bars to grab a Bud Light....

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